Strange Things Are Afoot at the Circle K

If only at the end of this 90 minute late 80's classic movie could we emerge from the theater and find out that the COVID-19 pandemic never happened. That is was just a figment of a movie director's imagination and not real.

I wish.

And I'm guessing 99.9% of people worldwide wish the same (I'm very literal and do need to account for that wackadoodle .1%.)

(Oh, and if you're not following along, I'm referring to the movie Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure.)

However, this is DEFINITELY not an excellent adventure and definitely not a 90 minute movie that we will emerge from.

Unfortunately.

I have a lot of things to write, but not sure I'll be able to get it all out in a coherent manner, but let's give it the old college try, as my Mom would say.

On Thursday, the company I work for gave the directive that we were to begin working from home starting Friday, March 13th. We got emails leading up to this directive that made me think in the back of my mind it was possible (bring your laptop home every night, make sure you can access the VPN, etc...), but honestly, I didn't think it could really happen. Because a directive to work from home meant things are serious...and that's tough to deal with (at least for me.)

So, on Thursday, March 12th, I packed up and said goodbye to the cubicle that I spend 40 hours a week in.

I brought my two monitors, docking station, laptop, keyboard, mouse, etc... home and my trusty in-home IT support guy set me up.

I am thankful that I have a nice space to work from and a view where I can see birds, squirrels, chipmunks, and (if I put my glasses on) deer.

But it's not the same. I can't yell over to Andrea in the next cube to ask if she's having trouble in Teams. I can't walk down to Terry's cube and ask her if she wants to go for a walk. And I can't go into Annie's office to sing whatever song is in my head at that moment (and grab chocolate.) Thus, the social isolation aspect of working from home has been tough. (But I do have that cute in-home IT support guy to chat me up when needed.)

I will say that it has helped when I and others turn on our camera during meetings. It's good to see people's faces and hear their voices. While it's not the same as in person, it's better than nothing!

I also realize that others still have to go to work during this crisis...to help others. I sincerely appreciate those who put their health at risk to help others. Doctors, nurses, other healthcare workers, grocery store and pharmacy employees. Thank you, thank you, thank you, and stay healthy.

Let's talk about something REALLY important, shall we?

Toilet paper.

This was taken the evening of Thursday the 12th at our local grocery store.

My food/paper goods panic started the night prior when I could tell sh*t was getting real. I volunteered to go to the grocery store on the way in to work on Thursday morning to at least pick up bottled water, since that's 90% of what we drink. At 8:45AM it was packed. I got four cases of water and while I wanted to get more, I knew I had to be on my way to the office.

During the day, I told John to work on a list and when I got home, I knew I would be going to the store. I needed something that I could exert control over since it felt like none of this was under my (or anyone's control.) After we ate dinner, I went to the store and piled up with basically anything I thought we might need. From meats to frozen food to bread to Pop Tarts to microwave popcorn. At that point they were out of eggs, pasta (although I got two random/off brand boxes of spaghetti), paper goods (as you can see above), and any type of cleaning supplies.

I felt like I was transported back to the Soviet Union. It was odd. Really odd. Eerie is more like it.

While I couldn't get toilet paper that night, we had enough to get us through the short term, so I laid that obsession to rest (temporarily.)

Over the next day or so, John and I discussed the fact that he's immunocompromised (due to being less than a year out from cancer treatment). I told him that I was worried about him going out into public and that I really thought it best he not do so. I was scared. I still am. Luckily, he came to the same conclusion and agreed that I would go out when we needed something.

It's hard to describe, but after having been through such a traumatic event (his cancer) and surviving it (which was exhausting and wore both of us down), my worry has been off the charts in terms of me getting sick or him getting sick again. This pretty much started right after we found out he had clean scans. I think all of the emotions I had to keep in check while he was sick so I could carry on were finally coming out. And now, with the pandemic, it's ratcheted up another notch. Thankfully, I have anti-anxiety medication that I can take when needed. And a loving husband and friends and family that talk me down when needed.

OK- back to toilet paper.

I went out on Thursday (the 19th, if like me you're getting confused) to get some more groceries and to look for toilet paper as we were getting low. None. No dice.

Ridiculous, but I was starting to panic about not having toilet paper.

I had a really bad day on Friday (the 20th) anxiety-wise and didn't sleep well and was up at 4AM on Saturday morning (the 21st). I decided since I was up and it was unlikely I'd get up this early again anytime soon, I went to the grocery store at around 6:30AM.

That picture you see above of the paper goods aisle? Same thing on Saturday morning. I bought a bit more food, brought it home, and then decided to step up my journey for the toilet paper.

The Target app (liar) told me that they had toilet paper. Nope.

I went to another grocery store. Nope.

I went to CVS. I see the single rolls of Scott toilet paper. (And hear the angels singing Hallelujah in the background). A woman was grabbing some and said, "Do you need some? I'll leave you some." THANK YOU! There were five rolls and I grabbed four, thinking someone might be desperate. She and I (6 feet apart) get up to the register and we start to notice that there are rolls of Scott toilet paper EVERYWHERE. Just piled up.

She gets up to the cashier and the cashier says limit of one roll per person. ONE? OK- now I know why people were dumping the toilet paper rolls everywhere. I think to myself that one is better than none and I'll hit Walgreens next. The cashier says to the woman, "I have some multi-packs back here- do you want one of these?" (Again with the angels singing Hallelujah in the background.)

So, let me get this straight. We can only buy one single roll of Scott toilet paper, but you'll sell me a multi-pack of 18 rolls? SOLD!

I stepped up and got the last multi-pack. Phew. I could now let that obsession go...for now.


I want to end on a positive note. I've discovered that there are certain things that are helping me get through each day.

A routine. A routine is huge.

• Get up and shower as if you are going to work. 
• Get dressed. 
• Put on makeup (if you feel like it). 
• Each lunch at the regular time. 
• Take a snack break when you'd normally walk to the vending machine.
• GET OUTSIDE. We have gone for a walk everyday so far (except one) and it's been amazing. I've never seen as many neighbors out and about as I have in the past week. And everyone's friendly (from a distance). I can honestly say that this has made me smile.
• Exercise. The outside walk will do it, but if you want to do more, do it.
• CONNECT with people. My friend Terry and I did a video chat. I did one with my parents today. Talk on the phone. Message. Send smoke signals.

Find something that will make you smile and be thankful for the day at hand, even though it may be a struggle. (And if you can't find it today, you'll find it tomorrow.)